Drink Count: 11 || "Take Me In, Tender Woman," Sighed the Snake

[eyesofaserpent]

A. [Action: 915 Bilko Boulevard, morning]

[Oh look, there's a package on the porch for Crowley. Well, to be honest, Crowley picks it up with a glitter on the lenses of his sunglasses. So far, Mayfield's gifts to him have been good, so he really has no reason to be wary of this box. He takes it to the kitchen to open it and... He feels a rush of energy that tingles on his skin and knowledge dropped into his mind about what he has just regained: his ability to change his shape.

So, just to test it out, he suddenly takes the form of a snake and flicks his forked tongue in amusement. In fact to any of the residents of 915 Bilko were to walk into the kitchen, they would see a snake that gives the impression of being mighty proud of himself.]

Hallo.

[Oh yeah, this snake can talk.]


B. [Action: About town, afternoon]

[Crowley's trying out a different shape. He's slinking around town as a woman with raven black hair, cherry red lips, and shades. He's wearing a slinky, low-cut, white with black polka dotted pencil skirt dress and black snakeskin Louboutin stilettos. He looks like every teenage boy's wet dream: the quintessential pinup girl.

Crowley still seems rather pleased with himself, parading around town like this. Go ahead. Approach him. He won't bite. Not even you, Loki.]


C. [Action: Olney's Tavern, evening]

[Well, he's not behind the bar. He isn't allowed behind the bar tonight because he's a woman. In fact, he keeps getting disapproving looks from the patrons of the tavern.

Crowley found out he was stuck a couple hours back. It was like he forgot his favorite shape. Really, it is just a set back, though a very frustrating one. Clearly, it's been too long since he changed his shape.

He drummed his perfectly painted red fingernails on the counter before taking a sip of her Apple Crisp.]

Bollocks... I really buggered this up, didn't I?


((ooc: To anyone selecting B or C, I will be responding with eyesofafemsnake so I can use the pretty icons.))

Comments

[eyesofafemsnake.livejournal.com]

Adam and Eve were starting to get really gross by 200, if you ask me.

[tenebrousking.livejournal.com]

...Let us avoid invoking mental images that no one wishes to contemplate.

[eyesofafemsnake.livejournal.com]

Er... Right.

But really, it's better for you lot that you have such short lifespans. Can you imagine how overpopulated the world would be if nobody died of natural causes?

[tenebrousking.livejournal.com]

I hear vasectomies are largely painless nowadays.

[eyesofafemsnake.livejournal.com]

Maybe now, but not before about sixty years ago.

[tenebrousking.livejournal.com]

Clearly, if you had the interests of man at heart, we would have eaten from the Tree of Necessary Surgical Techniques instead.

[eyesofafemsnake.livejournal.com]

Oh yes, of course. I forgot how little humans like breeding and making babies. They dislike it so much that the population is threatened.

[tenebrousking.livejournal.com]

Times have changed. It isn't easy conquering the entire planet when you have to make your own army the long way.

[eyesofafemsnake.livejournal.com]

What, are you going to clone people? [snort]

[tenebrousking.livejournal.com]

Propagating the human race isn't an easy task, but someone must do it.

[eyesofafemsnake.livejournal.com]

[He snorts.]

Oh, I'm sure. Now is it all going to be test tube babies or were you thinking of going back to the old traditions?

[tenebrousking.livejournal.com]

Oh, I don't know. My libido may dim with age, but I may be up to the daunting task at present.

[eyesofafemsnake.livejournal.com]

[Okay, he can't help but laugh at the absurdity of their conversation.]

I'm sure you have many lovely ladies lined up for the opportunity.

[tenebrousking.livejournal.com]

How about starting with the vivacious beauty before my eyes?

[Grimsley winks. And then choke-snorts a bit himself as he turns away.]

Right. I need a drink.

[eyesofafemsnake.livejournal.com]

Grimsley, you wouldn't want to deal with the charming megalomaniac child that came from us coupling. I saw that sort of mess once before...

[tenebrousking.livejournal.com]

That's simple enough. Shapeshift into a woman with a tubal ligation.

[Grimsley orders his wine before turning back.]

Though I'm certainly curious to hear more of this story.

[eyesofafemsnake.livejournal.com]

Er... I wasn't directly involved, mind you. Just sort of watched on the sidelines...

[tenebrousking.livejournal.com]

Liar. I've been forced to read the Bible in church, you know.

[eyesofafemsnake.livejournal.com]

Hey now, I'm not lying about that. I did not get involved in that mess. There were not Nephilim that had my genes. I might have been required to do a little cleanup, but none of those half-breeds were mine.

[tenebrousking.livejournal.com]

Awfully specific denials there... Ah, well! The unholy children tragically perished in the Great Flood, nonetheless.

[eyesofafemsnake.livejournal.com]

Some of them had to be taken out beforehand.

[tenebrousking.livejournal.com]

Do I sense a smug claim of achievement?

[eyesofafemsnake.livejournal.com]

Not exactly. I never relished those kinds of jobs.

[tenebrousking.livejournal.com]

But you would be powerful enough to take down the giants of legend?

[eyesofafemsnake.livejournal.com]

I took one of the little abominations down. I'm not proud of it, alright?